"We’re often told to pull ourselves together. But there’s far more value in pulling ourselves apart. This involves a spiritual renovation...remove all the familiar items and put back the essentials." -Ozan Varol
As I develop the heart of my future ministry, I have been playing around with an idea I call Radically Unchurching. One of the ways that we inadvertently perpetuate systems of domination is by failing to examine how insidiously these systems are the foundation of so much of what we do. I believe church needs to be examined thoroughly for how it is part of these systems. We need to consciously determine how the ways we gather and worship are either enhancing or detrimental. We must also acknowledge that to band together to dismantle systems of oppression, we must build bridges that extend past our faiths and differences.
In doing this, I want to be open to completely re-imagining church. I feel compelled to even examine whether or not the word church even represents what I am imagining since I know it can carry negative connotations for some and create a limited frame for others. It seems to me that the spaces for communities to explore the most essential human spiritual questions are limited. What is the meaning of life? What happens in death? What does it mean to live a good life? What does it mean to be a good person?
Must these questions be linked to theism or denomination? In order to do the work of healing the brokenness of our society, we must build community. How do we build communities of diverse beliefs and faiths? How do we bring together those of differing beliefs to meet common goals? How do we engage with those who do not claim theism nor denomination? How do we provide space for exploration, education, and support that are part of the process of having meaningful and transformative spiritual lives? Can we make space for this to happen outside the most “segregated hour in America?"*
I have begun my exploration with a group of mentors, friends, community partners, artists, and other religious leaders. We are loosely based on the Quaker tradition of a Clarity Council. Over the winter break we met in various combinations over 6 times to explore some of my imaginings of ministry. I began by examining the aspects of my life that have shaped my own spiritual path. These are foundational to shaping my new perspectives on ministry. There is no way to do justice to the complexity and depth of these areas in a short essay, so I will provide the bare minimum foundation to provide context for my explorations. The four main areas are Radical Unschooling, Unitarian Universalism, Community Theatre, and End of Life Doula work. They make up a majority of my life, parenting, and work experiences.
My foundational inspiration is Radical Unschooling. While many people think of this as a type of homeschooling, that is not accurate. Radical Unschooling is not just a way to parent children, but a way to be in the world. Radical Unschooling (RU) is based in the belief that we all have an inner wisdom, natural curiosity, and inherent worth. The core of unschooling provided me with some foundational beliefs:
Humans are more than just résumés and in our culture our worth is often diminished into simple productivity.
There is more than one right way to find a meaningful, happy life, but in our society there is intense pressure to follow a few narrow paths of what is culturally acceptable.
Punishment and coercion create lasting damage and do not work long term, but in our culture they have become the basis of life.
Radical Unschooling parents support each other to always stay focussed on keeping relationships strong and healthy and prioritized over conformity, or personal fears. It is about working together, and being able to be flexible over arbitrary schedules and restrictions. It keeps the focus on building internal motivation, rather than falling into the traps of reward and punishment that comes with things like grades. It does not compartmentalize life into discreet (and often arbitrary) subjects- or even school, work, and life- rather it integrates everything. Learning is not something that just happens when you are in a classroom with a teacher, but something that happens everywhere, all the time. One of my favorite aspects of RU is that it does not lock us into compartmentalized groups of our peers- rather there is real value in spending time with people of all ages. It is also based in play, playfulness, and enjoyment. Learning is allowed to be fun because you remove the arbitrary milestones, route work, and basis of being judged. Instead you follow natural curiosity, and work together to make the world accessible and expansive. RUers also allow for the real needs that come from being human- for example, we believe that teenagers should stay up late and sleep in, as their natural biorhythms tell them to do. This respect for our physical selves extends beyond eating, drinking, bathing, etc. to include adjusting to the seasons and natural growing spurts or other changes.
Radical Unschooling Is...
Relational
Partnering
Organic
Supportive
Internal Motivated
Integrated
Multigenerational
Process Oriented
Based in Natural Rhythms
My second inspiration is Unitarian Universalism, which is the denomination with which I identify. We are a faith based in heresy and believe in right actions, rather than allegiance to a common creed. One of our favorite adages is, “We need not think alike to love alike.” We believe that conversing about our different views of religion/spirituality should not be a show of tolerance, but an essential part of spirituality that enhances us all.
Since there is no requirement to adhere to a particular belief, we instead have 7 Principles and 6 Sources of inspiration for our spiritual lives. It is inclusive to all forms of faith- it is common and valid to identify as a Muslum UU, a Jewish UU, a Christian UU, or you can also be an atheist or agnostic.
Atheism and agnosticism are essential to my vision of ministry. Unitarian Universalism, even as a progressive, inclusive faith, is still framed in hegemonic Christianity. This can be alienating. For me, spiritual needs are not connected to theism. Even those of us whose beliefs do not fit with the Christian idea of God still need spirituality, spiritual community, and spiritual growth. So for me, spirituality is framed, not exclusively in religious terms, but in how we show up in our lives. It is how we create meaning, how we deal with and prepare for death, it is rooted in how we live a moral life. Making space for these spiritual needs, without having to be framed in traditional Christian rituals and language may make space for those who long to address life’s Big Questions, but are turned off by the ways they must come with the religious framework. Additionally, this openness may afford the chance to recognize the ways that the Christian hegemony is seeped in misogyny, racism, classism, ableism, etc. and discover ways to tease the Divine out from the systems that have eroded our perceptions of it.
Society as a whole has so deeply neglected that which is most human and most valuable and the most basic of all the works of love- the work of communication of caring and nurturance, of tending the personal bonds of community.
-Plaskow & Christ
The third of my inspirations is Community Theatre. The crux of community theatre is that it is intended to enhance the lives and experiences of everyone involved. It is also based in social justice. My view of community theatre as a performing art form is based in Paulo Freire's approach of critical pedagogy and in Augusto Boal’s Theatre of the Oppressed. It attempts to stimulate social change by encouraging the participants to build capacities for critical thinking, empathy for diverse viewpoints, and creative solution finding through participation.** It’s focus is always on building healthy communities, providing creative outlets, and working towards social change.
Community Theatre is grounded in social issues. It is a process for exploring possible solutions, with an enhanced tolerance for different perspectives with regard to the same problem. While many of the performances are staged, they are often held in unconventional avenues such as “streets, public places, in traditional meeting spaces, schools, prisons, or other institutions, inviting an alternative and often spontaneous audience to watch.”
Community Theatre can be as unconventional as a flash mob, poetry slam, or a conversation based on the improvisational foundations of “Yes, and..” If you are acquainted with UU church services- they share a lot of similarities- music, poetry, parables, puppets, videos, and audience participation. For my purposes, community theatre represents a creative, engaging, non-traditional way of addressing life’s Big Questions and ways to include and enhance communities.
When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid. -Audre Lorde
My last inspiration is based in my work as an End of Life Doula. End of life is a time that for most people, is filled with fear. One thing that I was able to do in this work, was help people dismantle their fears so that they could transition out of this life with a more peaceful heart. This work shares many similarities to Radical Unschooling in that you must let go of arbitrary schedules and rules and just exist in a space of radical love. It is also a time when flexibility and creativity serve us well- knowing how to use aromatherapy, music, animals, nature, laughter and many other ways to engage our senses and bring comfort to people was an essential part of the work. It also is based in the idea of inherent worth- that no one needs “saving or rescuing” It, like RU, UU, and Community Theatre- it is based on principles and does not happen in a vacuum- but must be centered in community.
Principles of Soul Midwifery***
To provide comfort, continuous support, and ensure they feel loved.
To create and hold a sacred and healing space.
To respect and honor a dying person’s religious/spiritual or atheist/agnostic beliefs and practices; honor the dying person’s beliefs about life, death or the afterlife.
To listen, and provide gentle therapeutic techniques using sound, touch, color, scented oils or other gentle techniques to alleviate pain and anxiety.
To ‘serve’; not aim to ‘fix’ or ‘rescue’.
To support families and their loved ones, and work within their community.
In preparing to die, there were many areas in which I helped focus my clients.
Acknowledge the important people in your life.
Remember treasured moments from your life.
Apologize to those you love if you hurt them.
Forgive those who love you if they have hurt you.
Express your gratitude for all the love and care you have received.
Tell your friends and family how much you love them.
You will notice that these are not just to be put off until we are at death’s door, but amazingly transformative daily practices- Acknowledging important people, treasuring life, apologizing, forgiving, holding gratitude and never passing up the chance to tell others that you love them.
Pulling from these many sources, I have been pondering how to bring my vision together while basing it in dismantling systems of oppression.
What if we made the revolution fun? -Andrea Smith
I have been an activist my whole adult life (thanks to you and Annie Hayes for that epiphany!), but I must admit that I always framed the work as difficult, grueling, depleting, and discouraging. One of the most transformative lessons from my first quarter at seminary was that activism can be a positive, enriching, humorous, and joyful thing. There are four main areas that I feel I have grown in my knowledge of oppressive systems:
Hegemony
Social Location
Intersectionality
Obvious v. Insidious
I have learned that the most impactful ways to dismantle systemic oppression requires us to not seperate the work out as something we do on Saturdays, rather, it must be integrated into everyday life. It must be reflected in the most mundane tasks, such as shopping. It must be interwoven into the core of how we choose to live. In approaching the work, we need to remain steadfast that we can’t use the tools of the oppressor to fight oppression. My years of being an advocate for peaceful parenting solidified my belief that you cannot be mean or cruel in the pursuit of any good.
Seminary has also brought into focus the need for relationship and community to accomplish spiritual work, like activism. It is work of a lifetime and must be grounded in life’s Big Questions. We often hit roadblocks when we fail to address justice work without honing our spirituality in a mature way. Issues like white fragility, performative social justice, inability to unlearn, failure to recognize embodied trauma, and struggling with (non)violence (do you like how I included concepts from three of the winter break reading suggestions and your book there?!?). Spiritual work is grounded in questions that force us to face these. As Dr. James Hollis explains,
Finding a mature spirituality will only occur when we internalize the fact that our egos are only a small part of a larger mystery. It is a mystery at work outside of us, in the cosmos, in nature, in other people, and in ourselves, as well. We are called to ask serious, more courageous questions of ourselves, for without these probing questions, we will simply fall back into the old patterns, which work neither for us nor our culture.
What is Reinvention?
I have been exploring a love-centered, relational-based, inclusive format that includes creative, joyful approaches to teasing out the systems of oppression/domination. I am exploring ways to Radically Unchurch that allow for seeing the old ways of church as “using the tools of the oppressor.” In my discussions with my Clarity Council we are exploring the ideas of whiteness and oppression as they frame the ways in which we are used to functioning, such as...
Hierarchies: churches function on strong hierarchies that create unhealthy power dynamics.
Membership: as someone who served as a Membership Director for several churches over 6 years, the ways we make people jump through arbitrary hoops, financially commit, and serve before receiving (an issue that is prevalent in UU churches) is not only prohibitive, but is directly linked to systems of oppression.
Meetings/Fundraising/Committees: I could write a massive essay on each, but, for example, drawing from Dr. Boyung Lee’s work makes it clear there are issues.
The seed of my Re-Imagining:
This Winter Break had me imagining what a new kind of ministry could look like and how my own particular strengths and experience could serve in creating new spaces. As an older white woman, I am aware of what I should not do. I watched the Portland and Denver Moms Demand Action flounder in their efforts to be part of the BLM platform. I know that we should be amplifying Black, Indigenious, People of Color, LBBTIQ+, Disabled and all marginalized community voices without taking up all the oxygen in the room, being fragile, and performative. I can be anti-racism, I can be an accomplice/ally, I can learn and grow and face my own prejudice, trauma and complicity. But another way I can use my privilege is to use all that I have learned to create a space where others can have transcendent and transformative experiences by meeting a community where they are. I fear that religious leaders often enter spaces with their own agendas that stay rigid within any community. I see a way to use my experiences to create a space that transforms with the community because it rejects the self-perpetuating norms of white institutions and allows a community to thrive in it’s own unique way. I want to be a parish minister, but I want to re-think everything. Although my thoughts are in their infancy, I have begun sharing this vision with my Clarity Council, mentors, and community partners. Every day it grows and changes. I am excited to see the ways it may travel and transform. Even if it never comes to fruition, it has already served to inspire me and create amazing meetings and conversations within my communities. Here are a few of the seeds of my ideas:
What is the space?
Black box space- multifunctional space open 24/7
Flexible central space with additional smaller areas and outdoor space
Food/drink always available
Comfortable seating (a radical idea for churches, eh?)
Art space/supplies
Musical instruments
Outdoor Garden/Playground/Space for support animals
Bathrooms, including showers that would allow for participation in programs like Family Promise and conventions like Youth Cons, and facilities for unhoused neighbors.
Laundry/Sewing area/clothing options (costumes, Clothes the Deal, Becca’s closet)
Lockers with which to provide safe space for valuables for those with no other options, like VA Cards, ID, Wills- for those for whom safe deposit boxes are not a possibility.
Library (books, music, computers/wifi)
Portable Stage/Pulpit
Support/pastoral care
Accessibility
Child-centered spaces
Quiet Space
Monthly inspiration/guides- This concept is based in the Respite course at Iliff and Soul Matters and other thematic based ministry support.
What is the community?
Based in Covenant/Principles
Multicultural, multigenerational
Integrated
Relational/Supportive
Organic
Process Oriented
Pleasure and art based
Community relationships would include, but not be limited to the following.
Churches
Shelters (Unhoused and Domestic Abuse)
Food Banks
Schools/Daycares
Job Corps
Community Colleges
Legal Aid
Planned Parenthood
Health Clinics
These community relationships would be symbiotic, for example, the community would be able to send those in need to the nearest Planned Parenthood, be involved with the activism of PP, and also include them in providing services such as the Our Whole Lives program. My idea here is based in a non-profit organization in which I was a founding member, called ABQ FaithWorks Collaborative.
What would this community do?
Provide Conferences- interactive gatherings with projects, speakers, workshops, social time, and based in a theme
Hold Performances- community theatre, sermons (or sermon-like presentations), Coming of Age presentations, poetry slams, music
Be Community Meeting Space- availability to local groups working to dismantle systems of oppression, fight for climate justice, etc.
Hold Workshops
Have Art Installations/Projects
Have Weddings/Family Ceremonies
Have Funeral/Memorials
Have Trans Ceremonies and Celebrations
Provide O.W.L. classes/SMART meetings
Have Quinceaneras and other culturally important celebrations
* Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. https://www.nytimes.com/1964/08/02/archives/11-a-m-sunday-is-our-most-segregated-hour-in-the-light-of-the.html
*** adapted from https://www.soulmidwives.co.uk
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